Thursday, July 31, 2008
- 5:17 AM
"C'EST LA VIE
increase-decrease your age with say:
HAPPY BURST-FREAKIN DAY MATTHEW CHARLES SANDERS!
Wish you ol the best.
Get the cupcake and celebrate it!
ta daaaaaaah...
Saturday, July 26, 2008
- 4:45 PM
"C'EST LA VIE
Im nothing in your eyes,aint i?
You and your past. So beautiful. You laughed,you messed up,you did your pleasure with people that you love.
Youre ashamed,arent you?
Of me,to face the fact,to tell people that hey this is my newly partner.
Arent you?
I know.
I admit i ever felt that way. But i thought youre too fugly. The fact u arent.
And i thought you wanted to show off.
The fact you didnt.
Why am i scared?
What am i afraid of?
Could you find me those answers?
You said you do. I hope you told the truth. But who knows? There are two possibilites that might happen,right?
So im not the one that you can blame if the curiousity control this situation,aint i?
Why cant we laugh?
Why cant we?
I wont regret. Its my choice.
Just dont tell me the bad news.
Heart,prepare yourself.
The battle will face you.
Everythings gonna be alright. Trust yourself.
Im voiceless,tearless,but i feel something stabbed me.
Tell all my friends im dead.
:((
- 11:24 AM
"C'EST LA VIE
communication breakdown
mute!
hello its me, a dumb creature. I'm a best whisperer. Billie Joe sings his song "redundant" to me. That nite he told me that his song is worth for my life. Thangs,bud! I listen to all the way up songs and bands and i imagine im the one that play them with my rokkkah band. I jump up on my bed, imagine the bed is a stage, i scream raaaaaaawr and no one hears me, i bet. I talk with my hands, typing writing and drawing. Everybody stares not listens. I'm all ears. I shout "SPEAK UP! SPEAK UP!" everyday and jump and jump again. I'm not like you. So you better thankfull to God because you can sing.
I'm voiceless.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
- 1:38 PM
"C'EST LA VIE
retycular and her bitter throat
i found the box connector. Not a found though, but he told me where he hides it. But i will always call it "discovery". Lol.
Hmmm im at home, skipping school, well grounded of this bitter throat and body temperature that high and higher with each passing time.
I lost my thursday lessons but thats ok, i have to face it, you know.
And wednesday will be the whole world mathematics day since this week.
Because i have 4 hours mathematics lessons on wednesday.
Dang.
Umm nothing special recently. School is back with moving class system and it makes me to be trapped in my boredom everyday, admit it guys i miss my old class and my old classmates and how me and my chairmate laugh at people and how i break the rules and my mischief. I miss a relaxive time. I miss everything. I hate adaptation. I hate to going thru all of these situations till i comfortable.
I hate teachers. I hate my classmates. I hate lessons. I hate how they say that in a less than 1 year i have to study harder. I hate them because i used to face my relaxive time. But bleh, for a bright futa. I want my bright futa. I have a bunch of goals.
So i have to write them on my notebook, write a schedule. Sounds crappy but whatever i just wanna manage thisself.
I'm growing older.
Nobody supports.
I wanna earn money.
And Im ugly as i wanna be.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
- 1:46 PM
"C'EST LA VIE
i certainly can breathe normally again! *sigh*
SIGHINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!
GO IN AND OUT!
IM HOME RITE NOW! IM BACK TO MY LOVELY PRISON!
everybody, put your hands up!
CLAP YOUR HANDS SAY YEAH!
*roomy*
hmmm what? i have to update everything!
i have to change this skin, this is too worn out! yucks!
just wait.
and omg im super duper extra exhausted.
- 7:51 AM
"C'EST LA VIE
Crazy train
The iceman is cutting his stuff, i'm staring.
Its a late arrival, and i'm freakin exhausted.
Dead tired.
I can't sleep with a chair.
I can't drink coffee after get up.
And i have to go to your (too sick to call it mine) freakin school, to face people and make damn sure theyll happy to see this face, thats what they want.
I'm too exhausted.
And i wanna throw up.
I have to text two persons,but i'm lazy, i don't wanna texting, i just wanna posting.
This blood,right here, makes me scared.
And mom is shouting.
On and on.
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
- 3:02 AM
"C'EST LA VIE
5 days more
Mmmumbling its almost 3 am and i still cant sleep,still cant tire myself,still cant make my eyes bleed.
Im watching my sister. Shes playing dog island. She drank coffee,overdose,so i think i'll accompany her fighting with mosquitos rite now. Lol.
Im drinking a plain water. Almost half of them left.
I phoned my monster,he didnt answer, i figured out, certainly the network was busy. Omg. He must know how freakin much i miss him. Its been a several of days since i never talked to him. I really miss how he singing me to sleep.
I really in need to hear his voice.
Bleh.
If i could see him rite now.
I wish he texted me but he didnt. God,no.
I hope he missed me too. Like i did.
Whatever.
I hope everythings gonna be alrite.
Hmmmph what again?
Tomorrow ill be back at prison.
And im counting on. 5 days later will be a super duper extra boring day.
Whatta life.
Face it.
And you,the asshole one, lol, i hope i could laugh at your pompous face, rite now.
Hmm my sister asked me to go to bed.
I slept much this afternoon. But yaaaaah i dunno what to do. I'll try to call my monster again,sooner,but i bet hes sleeping rite now.
:((
am i selfish?
Friday, July 04, 2008
- 1:10 PM
"C'EST LA VIE
I don't belong here
If I were somebody else.
Stuck.
You'll find me against these organs of body.
Poisons.
I don't deserve anything.
I've been trapped.
Deep blue sea.
And I can't find a place where the darkness lives.
Neither mosquito, nor God.
Don't park yours.
Leave me alone.
Forever?
Fuck no,cuntface.
16 turned me.
Cheesy bite bites my lungs.
God.
I gotta move,sooner.
As soon as possible.
Soonest.
Fastest.
Bring me an oxygen.
Kill me.
I'm a juice.
Torture.
Baked.
I vomit.
Those pills are still working.
Bittersweet revenge.
Sinful.
Panty.
Regreting much.
I should go back.
Unalone.
Dead tired feel me.
Forgotten.
Meow.
Break me.
Drowning
Eyes are watching.
Craps are talking.
You mad once again.
Twice.
Thrice.
How come?
Voila.
I wanna go home.
